When I Murdered My Motivation

Being filled

I recall a time, not too long ago, when I never got up in the morning full of energy just raring to go. Nothing seemed to really motivate me. Not even the good companies I worked for. Not the good salaries, positions, accolades, Deep down inside I wanted to do something else. Something huge, truly unique. Despite feeling this way, thinking if I committed myself full-time to it I would be successful. All I had to do is quit my good paying job. Needless to say, I didn’t have the guts to quit my job, I became consumed with thinking about my dream, constantly. At that point in my life, it was all about thoughts, rather than creating the reality of those thoughts. There were times I cursed those thoughts ‘to leave me alone!!!’ I stabbed those dreams many times. Yes, I committed homicide to those dreams. I murdered my dreams.

A couple days later when I woke to start my day, I noticed that for some reason I felt “lighter, free, like never before. At the time, it felt like the huge weight had been lifted off of me. I was literally amazed at feeling that way. People who knew me even commented how different I seemed to be. Reflecting, I noted to myself, that when I killed my dreams I actually set myself free. No more was there pressure over dreams unfulfilled. The more I realized and acknowledge this, the happier I was starting to become. Two weeks later, something nudged me out of bed at 3:00 a.m. int he morning and directed me to the room I call my quiet space. Unconsciously, I sat on the floor, something I would had never done consciously. Sitting there with the lights out in the middle of the room, not making any effort to get up, go back to bed, confused initially, yet feeling a peace like never before, after mentally I stop fighting the thought or analysis of what was happening. What I didn’t at the time this was the beginning of what would become a daily practice of meditation. Later, that morning I felt a vigor, clarity, a ‘pep to my step’, as I began and throughout my day. Like clockwork thereafter, at 3:30 a.m. in the morning I duplicated that ritual daily.

About four weeks later, for some reason, that nudge reappeared woke me up even earlier and led me to that quiet room, and announced, “now is the time to discover your real self that will lead to our true purpose. I who is called Inspiration will be your compass leading the way.” Interesting I never felt the weight, burden, anxiety, frustration since and during that announcement by Inspiration. Instead through discovering my true self I’ve felt, passion like never before. And as Inspiration announced, it has led to the discovery of what my true purpose is and has been all along. Using the ‘compass of Inspiration’ my need, must haves of life have changed from fear of lost too, rather to renewed vigor of fulfillment in every conceivable way possible. Along the way that ‘addictive good job and salary’ gone, replaced with the comfortable, freedom enhanced self-sustainability. Following the ‘compass of Inspiration’ has not only strengthen the thirst for discovery, but the will and power to activate what is being discovered. When I look back, murdering motivation was the right thing definitely the right thing to do. Why? Because it wasn’t the dreams that were murdered, rather it was the motivation that is driven by ego, often fear of not succeeding according to a learned identity. Inspiration, on the other hand, lead to fully discovering and activating my life’s purpose. Which by the way, incorporate my dreams, or as I prefer to call them, “Visions of what my Life Purpose have in store for me”.




Michael, a diligent and very active member of a spiritually based community, that encouraged it’s members to turn to God and use meditation when faced with anger, depression, hurt, or anxiety. Like others in the community, Michael was taught that Spirit would transmute his feelings for him and bring about the peace that he seek. Yet despite his faithfully following as instructed, he still doesn’t understand why he still is feeling depressed, having anxieties. ‘What I’m I doing wrong’, he asks himself repeatedly. Michael isn’t the only example of someone who is on the spiritual path and are experiencing what Michael is experiencing despite being diligent, faithful to their spiritual practice.   What Michael and many others like him are experiencing is ‘spiritual bypass.’  The question becomes just what is spiritual bypass?


Spiritual Bypass: “occurs when a person or persons use their spiritual practice in an attempt to avoid dealing with and taking responsibility for their feelings.” Like other addictions, spiritual bypass also is an addition. Understand this, anything,  any actions (alcohol, drugs, TV, food, shopping, anger, and yes meditation, as well, as prayer) used to avoid or embracing the responsibility of our feelings is an addiction. The skeptic would immediately, say that I’m saying one should not pray or meditate. But however, that is not what I’m saying or advocating. What I am saying having the right intent of one’s prayers and meditations is vitally important. Truthfully speaking anyone of us can meditate or pray for ‘two distinctively different reasons‘. Reason one is to avoid pain. Or on the other hand, reason two ‘is to become open to love‘.  If I meditate and pray to connect with myself, getting out of the head of myself, rather connecting and being the heart of myself connecting in the loving part of oneself. Rather than avoiding the pain, through connection with myself self, I seek to discover what is the source of my anxiety, pain, or distress. Using meditation in this manner, along with or in addition to prayer I’m not avoiding or running away fro the responsibility. Rather I’m embracing, as well, as acknowledging that the distress is there, but at the same time opening myself up to discover the action I can and must take to. If this my intent for my meditation or prayer, then I will become more centered. Therefore, my meditations are very helpful to my spiritual growth.


However, looking back to the example of Michael, the misuse or addiction causing uses of meditation result in something entirely different. First, there is a failure of truly discovering the root causes that is creating the pain, distress, or anxiety.  In Michael case, later he discovered, after using the meditation, and prayer with the right intent he was actually treating himself the way his parents treated him. He identified with that treatment. And because he embraced that identity, for so long he failed to connect with the inner child of himself, the loving part of himself, the centered self within him. It was easy to ‘give himself over’ to someone or something else, even though spiritually he became a seeker. Instead of ‘Inner Bonding’ meaning truly bonding completely with himself, Michael was ‘Bonding Outwardly’, looking outside of himself for taking the pain, distress, anxiety away.  Fortunately, Michael eventually began to Inner Bond, and the more he did, like any of us, he became more centered, and developed a greater embrace of his Inner Child, as he is on the road to overcoming Spiritual Bypass.


Overcoming The Fear Of Asking

Several months ago a group of top business executives, in a large corporation, met behind closed doors to discuss the possibilities of attracting new customers. As many ideas were discussed and tossed around, one of those attendees, Frank, as he listened, was having an internal debate with himself. About what you may ask? As Frank was listening, the thought occurred to him, ‘why no call Jim, one of their competitors, and ask him to send them so extra business?’ However, Frank was concerned that his suggestion without question would be negatively received, never put forth the suggestion or idea, he merely stayed silent. A couple weeks following that brainstorming meeting, Frank ran into Jim at a tradeshow. After greeting each other, exchanging small talk, Frank putting caution to the wind, ask Jim if he had any extra business that he couldn’t handle at the present time, because our excess capacity at our plant, he was in a position to help him out.  Jim smiled at Frank and said, “I wished you had called me last week, because of a couple recently acquired large accounts we are working over capacity, but at the same time we didn’t want to lose some our long-standing smaller accounts. I actually thought about calling your company to see if there were any interest. I got side tracked and forgot to call. Then few days ago Bob of the ABC company called to ask if there were contracts they could help us out with, and the rest is history. Sorry Frank we couldn’t connect earlier.” As Jim walked away, Frank mumbled to himself, ‘Wished I had Asked’ 

Jim isn’t alone in his fear of asking. Many of us have this fear of asking. Ironically, when we need it most, so often we hesitate, withdraw, anything but ask. As humans, we are trained to view asking as being demeaning, a sign of weakness, etc…. What we fail to realize that in many, many cases asking can be the difference between failure or success. Not only in business but even more so in life. What is important is knowing who we ask? And how we ask? An elder once shared with me this thought, “Go to God or the Divine first, then to man as you are directed!” That statement is saying the first place to turn is the Invisible Infinite Force that pervades the Universe. The name or label you may choose to call that force is unimportant. What is important is making this the starting place. The how starts in the quiet of your heart. Through this quiet heart, and truly ‘listening with our quiet heart’ we are led to the right person. Having the now a confident heart that fully appreciate and believe in the support the Universe provides, we experience results, that often amazes us, yet we know that we are led to the answer. We should not be afraid to ask for help, but we must do so with a soul that is silent. Additionally, with the understanding that the requested help may be provided from any source, family, strangers, books etc… Whatever the source, know the Universe has led you to that fulfilling source. Developing a deep understanding that changes is one of the universal laws, and the solutions to those changes are always available, never ending. Knowing, and truly appreciating this strengthen our resolve to overcome fear on any level, including overcoming the fear of asking.
other side of fear

Embracing The Conscious Economy


If we were to take a poll of the average person in the streets, an honest poll, asking the simple, yet honest opinion as to their beliefs, understanding, awareness, and yes fears regarding that dreadful word, “Economy”, what would you think their response would be? Perhaps it may be like this:

Economy stinks… It has failed miserably…History stands witness… There are very few people who have bid goodbye to this world with a smiling face… The wrinkles and scars of the stupid economy are visible on every face. Economy gives a job to someone, makes a company rich and fills the coffers of the Government but it leaves most of the people spiritually poor….The economy is nothing but cashing in on your lowest desires and stripping you of your inner powers.”

Undoubtedly, there are many thoughts related to the current economy. Let’s make it clear, that any consideration or discussion of the economy isn’t limited to a particular nation, ethnicity, etc…. Clearly with a great lack of balance exist under the current standards that create, as well, as affecting the economy. Consider for a moment the following:

Economy has to make a country rich while it has not… It has made only 5% individuals wealthy….

The remaining 95% of the population have to work for money. There is a huge difference between making money work for you and you going after money. Wealthy people make money work for them and the rest have to go to a job every day to earn money.” There is nothing wrong in going for a job but a flourishing economy has to facilitate richness of thoughts… It has to make you spiritually rich… It has to make you content,  feel worthy of whatever you are doing. 95% of the population who earn money may be happy but they are not content. There is a lack of self-worth in individuals, a seemingly visible helplessness which is apparent in the way they talk, act and go about doing their daily chores. This economy of the world has never worked and will never again in the near future.

The basis of the economy all over the world is to provide you the basic comforts a job, a house, a car, a mobile phone, insurance and the list goes on … It attempts to tell you that we can make you rich but it forces you to wear the garb of a beggar … It gives you comfort toys but it clips your hands and steals away your freedom… It keeps inventing new gadgets of comforts and throws it at you and you like a beggar pick it up because it is attractive and that is all you can do… You are a beggar and I am a bigger one than you….. because I did it all through my life. I failed to understand the difference between a beggar begging on the street, a prostitute mortgaging her body and an executive trading his/her intelligence. To me, they are nothing but different levels of begging. One is lending her body the other the mind…

Despite the aforementioned, a small but steady drop of hope is arising, that is creating powerful change, that is being embraced steadily by individuals worldwide. These individuals are creating a ‘new age of entrepreneurship’ that is spearheading a new economy. One that is far greater than any that has been witnessed or touched upon before. One which we as individuals never thought about. An economy filled with conscious entrepreneurs where there is no trading, no give, and take. A level of connectedness that happens effortlessly and without forcing anything upon you or others. Entrepreneurship, as well, as an economy where everyone is held accountable personally for their actions. How is that so one may ask? For starters, rather we actively pursue entrepreneurship or not each of us is an economy. So ask yourself what is the driving force behind the growth and development of your economy? Is the mind that has embraced the beliefs and identity that has lead to so much stress, hopelessness, lack of fulfillment, lack of wellness in many areas of your life driving your current economy? Is your economy ‘love centered’? Meaning do you love yourself, and radiate that love? Is your economy based on the richness of your ‘higher or purer mind’, that full of energy, ideas that lead you eventually getting what you truly want? Is your economy headed in the direction of the ‘New Age Economy, which is an economy of Love? Consider this quote from Swami Vivekananda as a foundation to examine your economy: ” Isn’t it man that makes money. Where did you ever hear of money making man? If you can make your thoughts and words perfectly at one, if you can I say, make yourself one in speech and actions money will pour in at your feet like water…”

For far too long, I know that I have developed my economy upon an external perception which can become overpowered external factors. But once abandoning this economy, I’m discovering how powerful, rich, and fulfilling it is to grow within my own economy, without begging, negotiating, etc… Additionally, because this is my economy, as you have your economy it means that each and every one of us are entrepreneurs within our personal economies. The responsibility, therefore,  is being fully conscious entrepreneurs within one’s economy. Embracing this responsibility is already igniting a growing wind of change among many persons throughout the world. Imagine what would happen when a billion people begin to embrace, as well, as live the change. Even before that, each us through growing, living and connecting our love centered economies are actively building a  ‘Greater Love Economy’ like never before.

A Change Had to Come

On Dec. 22th, 1964 the famous R8B singer and songwriter Sam Cooke released the song “A Change is Gonna Come”. Over the years, there have been many renditions of the is song.  Throughout the years, hearing this song has buoyed my spirits on more than one occasion. Thinking of this song, as my life as has changed in many ways, on every level. As an entrepreneur, these words in the song is significant to the “change that had to come”:

“It’s been a long, a long time coming

But I know a change gon’ come, oh yes it will


Then I go to my brother

And I say, “Brother, help me please.”

But he winds up knockin’ me

Back down on my knees


There been times that I thought I couldn’t last for long

But now I think I’m able to carry on


It’s been a long, a long time coming

But I know a change gon’ come, oh yes it will”


So often as entrepreneurs on any level, we are driven, almost possessed to make that money, by any means necessary. And I’m not suggesting that obtaining financial security, income is a bad thing because it isn’t. One of the important attributes that an entrepreneur must have is an awareness of ongoing changes that are occurring, that potentially will affect one’s business and interaction with others. On many levels, including in the world of entrepreneurship, a radical change is gaining momentum, as more and more people are defying former definitions, labels, standards, etc… There is a higher level of consciousness which is creating a greater embrace of wholeness, completeness of all aspects of one’s life, including entrepreneurship. This tide is leading more & more individuals  embracing Conscious or Spiritual Entrepreneurship. Among the many attributes of this change or shift, is an understanding that as an entrepreneur who is truly conscious, there is both an understanding and willingness to connect with others beyond the customer, client, affiliate relationship. A Conscious or Spiritual Entrepreneur isn’t  about knocking down, rather about lifting up. This entrepreneurship is a true reflection of the who & what this individual really identifies with. As the lyrics imply, this change has been a long time coming, but it is here, the question is will you embrace it? 

The Conversation


For some time, there has been a very personal yet needed discussion looming. There is a very powerful, definitely meaningful persona that from the beginning of our existence in this physical plane has sought our attention. In many cases, some of us had no understanding that such a persona existed. I for one could be counted in that group. Even though we may have been confused concerning it very existence, there still seemed like something unknown within us was attempting to communicate. Perhaps we attempted to dismiss or shut it out. Despite those attempts, that something would reappear. Our efforts to avoid this something, inevitably, will prove to be fruitless because it’s always there, always present.

Moving beyond being poor in any capacity  requires our stop avoiding this persona or that unknown something we’ve attempted to avoid for the vast majority of our lives. For the most part, each of us attached ourselves to identities, beliefs, ideology that require only one action on our part, namely, unconscious submission to the  illusion of who and what we are. But the moment  has arrived or  approaching, to discover the truth of who and what we are. Allowing that discovery to lead us becoming  receptive in welcoming  the “conversation”, that  the persona or mystical  something has been waiting to have with each us. This conversation is not  collective. Rather it is one deeply personal and individualized. Opening ourselves to this conversation is the first step to the self-activism that is deeply transformative.

There are two powerful aspects of any real conversation. First, recognizing that real conversations are opportunities for growth in some capacity. Seeking continuous growth awakens the opportunity for potentially transformative discovery.  Secondly, engaging in real conversations, requires one to be both a listener and contributor to the conversation. In the role of the listener, we become “students”, becoming unattached to everything around us being fully open, and yearning to learn. As a contributor, it requires more than verbal exchange. It requires a spiritual connectedness, transcending mere mental analysis, or the physical comfort zone. The real conversation that our inner being has been attempting to initiate from the very beginning with me, you, each and every one us, is truly unavoidable. In many cases, our unconscious unwillingness to engage in this conversation has resulted in the state of our impoverishment on one level or another.  Consciously through the identity that we have embraced, meaning our physical or “outside of our true selves” worldly belief system,  have attempted to lead the conversation. Yet despite that ongoing attempt, the power, as well, as the purity of our inner self, is completely aware that our very empowerment is at stake, therefore it persist to capture our attention to initiate the real conversation. The requirement on our part is to be still, and a willingness to be truly the listener. The more we embrace the persona of stillness, the greater our opportunity of transformative, discovery and embrace becomes. The one being still embrace fully the opportunity to be a listener, becoming unattached to the illusion that has dominated your life leading to the poor mentality & environment. My encouragement is to fully welcome the conversation.

Being Alive

Celebrating Being Alive

Overcoming the conditioning of P.O.O.R. as discussed in the previous post requires a willingness to commit oneself completely  to removing poverty consciousness from one’s being. Borrowing the theme of a popular television show, fulfilling this personal commitment requires transitioning from existing as a ‘Walking Dead’ to becoming “ALIVE”.

Being ALIVE goes beyond merely making a verbal declaration in one way or another. BEING ALIVE denotes and requires committed actions. In fact let me share with you the meaning of Being ALIVE……“Activating Infinite License  Vigorous Engagement “. Already, I sense some saying what in the heck does that mean.? To answer that, let me start by making this point. Being ALIVE discussed here is really incorporating fully  this mantra. Take 60 seconds repeat this mantra within yourself. As you do that not only hear it, even more so feel it. Each time you repeat it do so passionately. Feel the energy resonating through it. Though expressing this mantra for Being Alive sound great, truly understanding this mantra is even more important. So the question is what does it mean, and how does it enhance my own spiritual growth?

For starters, this mantra or Being ALIVE is the expression of the total embrace of loving unconditionally, “the fuel for transformation”, as well, as connecting with all of the Universe. Through embracing fully loving unconditionally the first key of the mantra is taken, namely, activating or releasing oneself from the “deathlike” or poverty filled state, one currently resides. In other words loving yourself unconditionally to embrace, create  Your own freedom, liberation, your own miracles. From the very beginning, each of us have received the authorization or license granting permission to embrace, as well, as co-create the path to liberation from a poverty consciousness to the wealth of who we truly are. What comes with this natural Divine license, are infinite resources each of us have as a result of the Super DNA that is very much a part of who we are. Being ALIVE requires our being vigorous in embracing this opportunity of freedom. Vigorous in activating the infinite resources of abundant light of real knowledge & understanding, unlimited unconditional love, ever present peace, and the power of simply Being.  Additionally being vigorous in removing all the barriers that have hindered us in the past our Being ALIVE. The more you are fully engaged joyfully, lovingly with the embrace of your freedom, the more you eliminate the poverty consciousness from existence in any conceivable way.